doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize
