Whod you bang
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Every concussion has its silver lining
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize