if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I can text with my tongue
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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