I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
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