this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Rumble strips road head = magical
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
