Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Randomize
