she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
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