The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Randomize
