we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
I lost the right to judge tonight
Randomize
