Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
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