life is too short to starve
life is also too short to be fat
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
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