Me. At least after what I've been through.
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Randomize
