Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
God, you're like boner-b-gone
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
