please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
