I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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