They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Randomize
