Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize