She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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