Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Randomize
