so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Randomize
