I feel like abortions should bother me more
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize