I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
you inspire me to be a worse person
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
