he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
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