I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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