Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I'm gonna fight the coyote
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
