I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Randomize
