also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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