Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
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