Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
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