i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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