i think my tv is drunk
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
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