he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
I'm bleeding and have questions
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
