I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Randomize
