Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize