redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Randomize
