On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
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