FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
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Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
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It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
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