I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Randomize
