the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
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