So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
I puked a lego.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
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The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
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