Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
Randomize
