I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
He uses pillows to masturbate.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
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