Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
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I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
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Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize