I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
