I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
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