Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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