he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
