In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Randomize
