BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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