Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
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