a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize