mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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