Texts From Last Night

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  (810): View more from Michigan

  I wish I could teleport

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  (810): I wish I could teleport http://tfl.nu/48ko
  Replies (13) Good night (1498) Bad night (542)
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination

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  (614): Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination http://tfl.nu/cegt
  Replies (1) Good night (1906) Bad night (488)
• Favorite

  (972): View more from Texas

  What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?

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  (972): What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard? http://tfl.nu/a8hs
  Replies (1) Good night (736) Bad night (1054)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.

  (419): View more from Ohio

  I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.

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  (513): I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth. (419): I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat. http://tfl.nu/rzvc
  Replies (10) Good night (2888) Bad night (563)
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  (949): View more from California

  Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.

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  (949): Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class. http://tfl.nu/ne6k
  Replies (7) Good night (800) Bad night (2563)
• Favorite

  (250): View more from British Columbia

  Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.

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  (250): Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward. http://tfl.nu/w09f
  Replies (36) Good night (736) Bad night (8443)
• Favorite

  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser

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  (262): what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser http://tfl.nu/r42a
  Replies (30) Good night (10742) Bad night (1226)
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  (859): View more from Kentucky

  thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.

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  (859): thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that. http://tfl.nu/160n
  Replies (11) Good night (6126) Bad night (895)
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  (239): View more from Florida

  gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.

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  (239): gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me. http://tfl.nu/wt0v
  Replies (9) Good night (1976) Bad night (3417)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt

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  (814): I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt http://tfl.nu/8loq
  Replies (8) Good night (584) Bad night (2184)
• Favorite

  (602): View more from Arizona

  You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink

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  (602): You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink http://tfl.nu/maij
  Replies (7) Good night (1929) Bad night (557)
• Favorite

  (504): View more from Louisiana

  My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.

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  (504): My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway. http://tfl.nu/crxf
  Replies (15) Good night (606) Bad night (3065)
• Favorite

  (208): View more from Idaho

  Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.

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  (208): Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch. http://tfl.nu/hfll
  Replies (6) Good night (762) Bad night (1444)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."

  (1-541): View more from Oregon

  Finding that toy duck there was weird right?

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  (503): This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again." (1-541): Finding that toy duck there was weird right? http://tfl.nu/x1mm
  Replies (0) Good night (667) Bad night (266)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.

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  (816): Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire. http://tfl.nu/gpak
  Replies (5) Good night (889) Bad night (517)

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