and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
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Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
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Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.