if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Randomize